Are you making your life harder than it has to be? Remember when we thought life was easy and carefree? Before the worries of a job, money, mortgage, spouse, kids…the list goes on. Remember the good ‘ol days? We were confident in our decisions and hopeful for the future.
When we were young we saw the world as simple and hopeful; fun, and adventurous. We were happy to stay up late with our friends, watch movies and eat junk food. We were happy to go to the park and run around all day.
As we grew older, outside influences started to change us. Maybe it was the boss who you wanted to please so badly you were willing to work 60 hours a week. Giving up time with family and friends, and missing time doing the things that you loved to do. What did you gain? A promotion? More money?
But what did you gain PERSONALLY? Are you now 50 pounds overweight? Is your family upset with you because you haven’t taken time for them? When was the last time you did something for yourself? Can you even remember?
Over time you started to lose touch with who you were and what you wanted. Maybe once you had achieved what you thought you wanted, you looked around and didn’t like who you had become.
Here are five common mistakes making your life harder than it has to be, and how you can start to fix them today.
1. You’re letting loss and mistakes devour you.
Life is full of loss; A failed relationship, the death of a loved one. Do you need to forgive someone? Do you need to forgive yourself? The job you didn’t get, the promotion you feel you let slip through your fingers…you can’t get to the other side and feel happiness if you don’t feel the loss. Feel it, stop pushing it away and closing the door on it. You need to face it, know that it is in the past and it can’t be changed. Open a new door to happiness.
2. You’re stuck on your past mistakes.
One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself is the gift of forgiveness. Forgive yourself for your past mistakes. Examine the situation and pull out the lesson; things don’t happen without a reason, there’s a lesson in there, find it. Learn from it. Forgive yourself for your actions or the actions of others. If there’s a situation and every time you think about it there’s a heaviness or sorrow surrounding it, you have to learn to let the past be in the past, and forgiveness is the path that will get you there.
3. You’ve lost sight of your own goals.
Are you living up to someone else’s expectations? Have you lost sight of what you truly want for your life? Do other people make you feel guilty for how you live your life? Sometimes we get lost in trying to live up to someone else’s expectations and doing things just to impress them. Take a moment and think about it, what are your goals, and are you doing something daily to achieve those goals? People will come and go in your life, but at the end of the day you have to be able to live with you.
4. You assign negative intent to people’s actions.
Your friend never texted you back. Another driver cuts you off. A co-worker goes to lunch without asking you to join them. You only get 2 likes on your Facebook post. You can find a reason to be offended on a daily basis. You assign negative intent to people’s innocent actions. You take it as a slap in the face, when that was never the intent. Stop taking things so personally. Instead, look for the good in people and remember that we are not perfect human beings.
5. You keep cutting corners and taking the easy way out.
Do what is right, not what is easy. Why? Because YOU will know. Do the right thing.
I know I’ve made my life harder than it had to be because of all 5 of these. I’ve had to work at forgiveness for myself and for others. I’ve had to stop worrying about what others expect of me, and live my life the way I want to live it. I’m not hurting anyone; I’m being true to myself.
I’ve been offended by people’s behavior but after close examination I realize that it was my reaction to the situation, their intent was not to be hurtful. I’ve cut corners, most definitely. But I’ve learned from all of these and I wanted to share them with you. We can never grow and change and become better people if we aren’t willing to look at the negative aspects of ourselves.
Wishing you all happiness and forgiveness.
With Gratitude,
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